The Goal

"The goal is to be as aggressive as possible." These are the words of the oncology doctors as they make decisions with regards to Kregg's treatment.

Kregg started his radiation treatment on Monday. He will have daily radiation treatments for at least two weeks. Kregg is eager and willing to be treated aggressively.
I am not a doctor, but my goal is to be aggressive as possible as well. I want to be aggressive in pursuing my heavenly Father through prayer for peace and comfort and wisdom to know how to be the sister Kregg needs right now. For the past 30 years, there hasn't been a relationship between Kregg and I. We had very little, if any, mutual interests. Through the years, we saw each other only once or twice a year at family gatherings.

Since Kregg's diagnosis, I have leaned on God to guide me. He has given me an opportunity to have a new relationship with my brother. I know that it is never too late for anyone to aggressively pursue God or to pursue any broken relationship that exists in our lives....we just need to aggressively rely on God and ask Him to pave the way.

Today

Today, I am grateful for the love and care Kregg is being shown. Friends, family and people who have not even met Kregg are praying, offering services, giving encouragement, providing care and assistance to Kregg. The attention he has received the past three weeks is truly a genuine outpouring of love. In this world... for many of us love can be confusing. Love from others often becomes conditional. The capacity for someone else to love us the way we were designed to be loved can only be filled by God's love. And yet, we search and search for acceptance and love in so many places that will never lead us to God.
Today, I am thankful for the family God gave Kregg. He is loved unconditionally.
Today, I am grateful that Kregg has access to a health care system that gives him access to the best doctors, nurses, social workers, case workers, non profit resources, and countless volunteers even though he does not have a penny to his name.
Today, I am grateful for the times I spend with Kregg. By his choice, there have been no tears. There have been "moments" and something to laugh about each time we are together. I hold these moments and the laughter close and will never forget them.

The Knowing and the Unknowing

We know Kregg has cancer. We do not know how long he has to live. For now he chooses to live where he is the happiest with his brother Kris. We do not know how long Kris will be able to care for his brother. Together they have decided to fight for life. They have made the decision to face the daily, hourly and sometimes minute by minute struggle away from addiction. We know that this is a battle in it self. We know that when Kregg gets to the end of his life on earth as he knows it now, he will be greeted by his heavenly father with a new body. He will not have anymore pain, addiction, personal wars to fight, or needs that are not met. We are grateful for whatever time God decides we have left with Kregg and we rest on the peace knowing that he will have eternal life.

Kregg, Sue and Kris

Tuesday

One out of three Americans will develop cancer. One out of four males and one out of three females will die of cancer. 60% of cancer deaths can be prevented by not smoking, proper diet, exercise and screening.

Please love yourself for the ones that love you.

Sunday

This past week, my brother, Kregg was diagnosed with lung and brain cancer. He spent a week in the hospital patiently and willingly going thru many evaluations, tests and talking with numerous doctors as they poked and prodded trying to find the primary source of five metastasised tumors they discovered in his brain. He was released from the hospital on Friday after a lung biopsy confirmed our worst fears. Kregg's journey with living each day with cancer has just begun. Amazingly, my brother is calm and in no pain.